updates...

The road ahead...
When we went on our road trip I was mesmerized with the scene pictured. Maybe because I was raised with mountains that surround there is something wonderful about wide open spaces. I am still surrounded by mountains but they are more suffocating to me then protective. I can tell when I drive up to Mt. Baker there is a point on that highway where I literally start feeling closed in, the mountains rise up and seem so foreboding. So when I see wide open spaces I physically relax...begin to breath more deeply. Maybe that is why I like the ocean rather then the woods, the prairies rather then the Rockies. That really isn't an update but a tidbit of information. :)
Scotty is progressing rather well. He is so motivated to get better. Remember when I was trying to heal quickly...well his motivation is far beyond what I could have and did muster. I knew he was like that but it is pretty amazing to watch as he pushes ever so gently on his his newly mended ligaments. One thing about Scott that is so admirable and frustrating is his discipline. I get mad at him for wanting to go and work out simply because it makes me feel so amazingly undisciplined. While I loath the workout he embraces it.
On another update note...I am now the new International Program Director for Lynden Christian High School. Having been the International Host family Coordinator...that's a mouthful...I have been promoted to this position. Robb, the outgoing Director has left such a great program I am hoping to keep building on his foundation. This will entail more work on what I am already doing but I am ready to be busier. Scott may be gone in September so all of everything may fall pretty heavily right off the bat...but preparation has begun.
On a side...Mijo and Nick are both working really hard in the raspberries and cherry's respectively. Mijo went to work at 5 last evening and came home at 3:30AM. Nick has been getting up at 3:45 AM and literally running till he gets off at 2-3PM. He has been in Eastern WA and comes home this Saturday. They are busy, Scott and I not so much right now. Kind of a strange reversal in roles. As everyone struggles so with the heat...we may not get out of the 60's today. Another normal abnormal summer.

Blooming flowers !

I think it's the color that attracts me much like the bee. The shape of the petals, the scent...maybe it's everything about the flower. You know that verse that tells us to consider the lily of the field..clothed in splendor...how much more does He care. Mijo asked me the other day what pieces of wisdom would I have wanted to know at her age. That girl knows how to warm my heart :). Of course I had a plethora of things to say but one thing came out of my mouth that surprised me. I said the older I get the harder it is to believe that God loves us. Maybe age brings with it an awareness of how ugly we are as a human race but maybe not even that far out..how ugly I am as a human being and why would God expend any of His extravagant energy on loving any of us.
Then I look at flowers...their extravagant beauty in shape, size and color and all for just a moment. I know the biology of colors and bees etc. but God certainly did not have to make it all work out that way. Not only the flowers we painstakingly grow but the wild meadows of bursting joy for no one but the Creator to enjoy tucked away in the mountain valleys expresses His love in the minutia. If He so meticulously shaped these flowers with the rainbow of colors and shapes and smells...why is it so hard for me to wrap my mind around the idea that He finds joy in the beauty He has made in each of us. Granted we do much more then sit around and be beautiful...but maybe God enjoys us as we enjoy His creation in spite of our thorns. I know He hates what makes us ugly but then we do as well...who enjoys ugly?
So summer is a garden of beauty and I will take time to contemplate those flowers in the field, in my garden, in my pictures.

Bringing fourth the 4th

These children of ours:

So we went to the fourth of July celebrations ... the last time I had done this with the kids Nick was sitting in my lap, plugging his ears because of the noise and we were all not having a wonderful time. At that time, both children did not like LOUD noises...which we could only find out when LOUD noises were present. Needless to say, 10 years latter it went much more smoothly. Scott had to stay home because dogs don't seem to out grow their fear.
I love fireworks...they are just pure joy and celebration. We got to the park 4 hours ahead of time because I was afraid we would not get good seats. We were there WAY to early, BUT because were there early, I got to dance, watch people and goof off with my lovely children. I like belonging to this country. I became a citizen about 11 years ago after being a resident alien ( love that description...was hard to let go) since 1976. Being born in Papua to a Dutch father and French mother, my cultural identity has always been in flux. USA is a great country to take all those loose ends of cultural identity and help weave together a place to belong. There are not that many countries in the world that you can belong no matter your genesis.
This is a great country....I love that I belong.

Wednesday wonders

I am ready for another road trip...maybe just to get away again from the routine of not exactly knowing that the future holds. On road trips life seems suspended and time bounces from empty gas tank to the next. Here things are so uncertain, what exactly is Scott going to be doing next year, what exactly will be my responsibilities, what should we be doing now and what should we let go. Every summer between school years things change in my job. Often times I am picking up a new class or changing my responsibility...this year is no different. What is different is that Scott is home every day and his work future is uncertain.
What I do know is how much fun it was to be in Chicago and to be with family and to laugh and talk about issues important but then not so important. As we were leaving my little niece made me a necklace. As she put the beads on the string she solemnly said..."I make these necklaces for those that I love". It hangs in my car because every day I want to remember that a little 5 year old loves me. What was also fun was that my oldest niece and my youngest niece are there together in the same town...well, for a few months anyway. My sister-in-law is having another baby girl. My oldest niece and I are very similar and watching her become who she wants to be in this grand old town is such an inspiration. She laughs easy and articulates so well...such good company.
Then there is my brother and the twins and my sister-in-law and a lovely house and Chicago and walking and talking and eating good food and enjoying great thunderstorms. It was a great time...I have no idea why we have not done that sooner.
Home again home again jiggety jig...June gloom is holding on with a tight watery grip but will let go as soon as July comes around. Summer transitions...have begun.

Road Trip Adventures

Scott and I decided on a whim to go on an adventure, a 4000 mile road trip to Chicago and back. So we did and we had such a good time. The verdant green valleys and prairies accompanied us across Washington, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin and Illinois. It was green, wet and beautiful and oh so mesmerizing mile after green mile. Scott did all the driving and I was amazed at his endurance for driving. We listened to stories on CD stopped only when we were tired and that was usually 11 or midnight. Our longest stretch of driving may have been the 1000 miles in one day...but I really have not thought about those details. On the way back we stopped at Mt. Rushmore and Crazy Horse but other then that we drove onward and back.
We needed to think some things through like what are we gong to do about Scott's inability to work for the next 5 months. What should I do with new opportunities at school, how to we help Mijo prepare for the next phase of her life, how do we keep in contact with our families and to reconnect with being a couple. I wish I could say we had these long discussions about all of these and really came back with a plan of action.
We did not...but we did come back very grateful for our families and the opportunities we have to make choices that glorify God. Scott and I still really like each other and when we have the opportunity outside of every day pressures we have a lot of fun. I learned how much I miss having my family closer and how much I wish I could be a close by Aunt rather then that far away Aunt that comes now and then. I was very proud of the kids who did living on their own pretty well.
Nothing profound...but delightful. Maybe now we can figure out the next steps ahead.
More stories ahead of our time in the great green miles.

10:20 AM...what 's on your mind

Face book always ask us whats on our mind and for the life of me every time I wonder what I should write down from the many many things that flit across the screen of my mind.
I have been at school all week trying to organize my thoughts only to realize as I go through the past school year what I should have, could have, wish I had done many things differently. What students I should have paid more attention to, what lesson I should have lingered on, what students I should have kicked out of class. What behavior I overlooked and what I should have done different. Teaching is hard work. I know I failed in so many ways in the things that are important and may have succeeded well in the things that will be forgotten.
I look out at my empty room and remember all the students flitting in and out like the thoughts on my mind. Today I was reminded that what I thought was a minor confrontation with a student has grown to a major incident in their mind. I can't go back and undo nor can I even explain enough to assuage their anger, all I can do is remember enough not to do that again.
I care what students think of me, I want them to know that I respect that they are teenagers and have valid opinions ...but when it is all done, they are fickle and I can't have what they think be the mirror I believe.
I need summers for more then just a break from the routine. I need summers to evaluate what it is that I do...and remember that it is just a part of who I am.
This would be really long status update !

SUMMMER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Those of us who mark each year with scholastic transitions know how it feels to move from the school year to summer. If the weather does not cooperate it does not matter...Summer marks a time for change, rest, relaxation and rejuvenation. I have a lot to get done...BUT even though that is the case it is now on my time rather then the bell schedule of LC. It takes about a week to unwind the year so in that time I hope to do my biggest job of the summer and organize my classes and refresh my curriculum. I want to take a road trip to Chicago as well as up to Saskatoon...I want to learn something new...do a garden well...get a yoga routine down...spend time with friends...go through every room in this house and throw away until it is painful. That's just the start..it is a lot like a new years resolution but with less pressure. So on this first day of the summer break....this is what I desire to accomplish.