Sunday, July 15, 2007

Behaving Badly!

I am sure none of you can relate, but in the spirit of honesty let me tell you...I behaved quite badly this week. I lost hope, yelled at the kids just because I could, quit several times and simply lost it. BTW...all is done, all animals in loving homes, house is cleaned, classes are done, even our plants have a place to settle....Mind you...this all transpired in its entirety this Friday. OK, back to the story, it is Thursday afternoon and I am stressed OUT!!!!!! A wonderful lady, I am sure, has just told me over the phone that maybe because we don't have all the details taken care of we are really not supposed to go. She used the trump card, God had told her and she felt obligated to let us know this new message from the Almighty. I am weary to the bone, my house is in disarray, my kids are sad, my husband is tying up loose ends, I have a paper to write AND I get a message from God that we are all in the wrong because we can't quite get everything together. Bless her heart, I was in no mood to talk, I should have but I hung up the phone, curled into a small ball and wailed. Scott walks in the room at this time, watches me melt and wonders what for awful has happened. As I wail in desperation, Scott, (wanting to tell me ..NOT the time Heidi for a melt down.. SNAP OUT OF IT ) gently puts his arms around me and lets me drain my stress tank and lets me know its going to be all right. I so wish in times like this I would remember the faithfulness of God. I don't...I hate that about my faith. I know better...I really do !ANYWAY..we are on the way to Idaho. All packed up and somewhat rested. Wanted you all to know inspite of me, God is previous, He already knows, He's already been. Remind me next time !!!!

5 comments:

Dawn said...

Winzig sends her greetings. She went for 2 long runs yesterday along the Bylsma Road. It was a picture postcard like sunset and Tom have the convertable out so she got to feel the breeze in her hair! She is doing well and we pray the same for all of you.
Dawn

about the long and winding road... said...

Thanks Dawn..it means alot to read the updates. We are weary of sitting in class every day. Today we heard about every disease we could catch...OK..why was it that mosquito's were a good idea? Talk to you soon..Heidi

Unknown said...

Well, I haven't looked at the blog because I just KNEW you would be too busy to post. But no, you are on top of EVERYTHING!! Sounds like you are doing great to me!

The best thing about being a woman is you can cry!!! I used to go out at night and empty trash so I could cry in the alley without anyone seeing me. This was when I had kids the age of yours, worked full time, and still had the supper dishes to do and homework to "encourage"! That crying is just like taking a Xanax--no more stress!

By the way, God has only spoken to me 3 times IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!! I don't know about other people. It pretty much scared me to death all 3 times, and I would have been afraid to tell anyone at the time!

Unknown said...

I hadn't been on your blog because I just KNEW you wouldn't have time to post. Sounds to me like you have EVERYTHING important under control.

Great thing about being a woman--you can cry! Just like taking a Xanax--no more stress!

Unknown said...

sorry...it SAID it didn't take it the 1st time, so posted again, and as you can see, it repeated...